Fools in Love Answering Agency!

So one of my real life talents is that I'm pretty good at relationships (not my own, but apparently everyone else's). Now, I preface this with a disclaimer: I HAVE NO PSYCHOLOGICAL, CLINICAL, OR THEOLOGICAL TRAINING. I do however have a lot of experience, in the social ring, and a degree in Theatre Arts may not be good on a resume, but it makes one an excellent people watcher, and learner of behavior. I will change names and identities, so that no-one gets really embarrassed.

So I'll try, from time to time, to give real life examples of my friends-who-are-girls. Maybe you can apply them to yours, maybe you completely disagree with me and leave me terrible comments. Either way, I'm putting my "experience" on the table.

I actually have two recent current examples:

1. If a waiter buys you dessert, do you give him your number?

Now, I preface this anecdote with the fact that the lady who questioned me, lets call her...Tina, was already attracted to this waiter, and probably would have given him her number had she been asked, but was instead presented with a free piece of pie.

So, is it ok to leave your number under the tip, if he gives you a free dessert? Yes, it's ok. He didn't buy the whole meal, he didn't hit on her during the meal. He seems to be a stand up guy, and she's putting the ball in his court, and there's no guarantee he's even going to call her (don't worry Tina, he probably will). So if it so happens you're out on a lady date (two girlfriends grabbing dinner, not two ladies grabbing dinner, a movie, and then each other), and the waiter buys you dessert, and makes it clear its you and not your friend, and you think why not, then I say you should go for it...Tina.

2. How do you bring up a possible relationship with someone who you've been a bit intimate with, but haven't had much serious contact with since?

TALK TO HIM! But that's the easy answer. But let me give you a little background: Lets say that...Dani, was a camp counselor last summer, and cuddled up one night with another counselor, and after talking for a while (and no drinks, its important to note), they kissed. Camp ends, they part ways, but still talk, and the kiss never comes up again.

So, how does Dani bring up a relationship (or at least the possibility of one?). The easiest way is to bring it up directly, but that provides the most risk, and if misspoken or mishandled even a bit, its automatically going to terminate any future possibilities. A better route is to ask about a personal or dating life. Now, there are a few options the man will take:

1. If he redirects, or avoids, chances are he has one already and doesn't want to lose the possibility of a future with you, so he doesn't come clean.

2. If he says he's all free, that means he's lonely, and possibly desperate, so avoid.

3. If he says no, and turns right around and asks you out, bonus for you.

4. Your prime situation is this: He says he's not dating anyone, and asks if you are, you smile, and put your hair behind your ear, and say, "not at the moment..." and if he has any sense at all, he'll ask you right then and there. If he doesn't, then at your next interaction, you go for broke and ask him about it, and see what happens. But that should be a last resort.

Now, like I said, I have no technical training, but my experience has been accumulating for many years now, and I'm trying to give back.

Sincerely,

The Future Genius.

Who Are You?

No, this is not a post about how much I love The Who (and honestly, who doesn't love The Who?). But this IS a post about a recent commercial I saw (about a billion times, b/c I watch tv on the internet, and a show will get one commercial sponsor and you see the same commercial about 100 times). It's for Norton anti-virus software (and can be found here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOowgs4F1Gc). Now, I usually agree with keeping up with one's anti-virus software (I lost a LOT after I fooled around with limewire on my last computer), but the premise of this commercial...unnerved me a bit. It's all about stuff, and ends with the question: "What are you without your stuff? More importantly, WHO are you?" Now, in modern day America, we ARE obsessed with stuff. Look at the video game industry, its gone from non-existant 20 or 30 years ago, to a multi-billion dollar industry today. We give our stuff to charity so we can buy MORE STUFF!

But we are not the sum of our stuff. We are more. The DNA of this country is littered with people who had nothing and made the history books. It's practically the backbone of our way of life. Since when are we measured by what we have, and not who we are? We are greater than the some of our parts, and it disgusts me that anyone would consider us any less, let alone a company who works in America, providing a vital service to the modern population. Presidents are elected on character, CEO's live and die by how they are viewed in the public eye, not by how many cars they have, or what house they live in (mostly because they all live at that level). Heroes come from all walks of life, and villains are both rich and poor. Who we are is absolutely not measure by assets, its measured by character, will and drive. It worries me that this is the way advertising execs think of the American public. Now we haven't given them much reason to think or behave otherwise (Jersey Shore Season 5? REALLY?).

So, who are we? Will we sit idly by while the advertisers continue to appeal to the lowest common denominator, or will we choose to raise it? Who are we to not educate ourselves? To not pull ourselves up by our own bootstraps, regardless of how much STUFF we have? We are who we choose to be.

So, Who Are You?

Sincerely,

The Future Genius.

What Ever Happened to the Heroes?

no, i'm not talking about the 5 seasons of the NBC sci-fi drama that started out strong and just didn't really know where it was going, i mean real life heroes. i recently heard a song by Joss Stone, aptly titled: What Ever Happened to the Heroes? now, it was included on the soundtrack for the Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer, so chances are it didn't get much play by anyone outside of only the most loyal of Marvelites (can i coin that phrase?), but when one puts deep thought into song lyrics (as i often do, to usually fruitless ends), it raises interesting questions. so in the second verse of the song, she starts naming off famous "heroes." Joe DiMaggio, MLK, Princess Di, etc. it used to be we had heroes like that, that stood up for something, where as now a days, (she says, though i don't totally disagree with her), its Kurt Cobain/take a pill for the pain, etc. now we can discuss all day about an over medicated society, but pharmaceutical juggernauts aside, she's kinda right. and granted, this song is at least a few years old, but still. i mean, John and Kate? The Kardashians? Snookie? i mean, these people have reached single name level icon status, for what? helping the poor? creating jobs? rescuing the economy? no, because they're on tv! and for whatever you wanna call "reality" tv, you need to realize, its really not real. what happens happens, but in the magic of editing, they can make it look like anything happened. thats just the way it is kids. you have to go back to the real world new orleans (the first one) to get the last real vestige of Reality tv. nowadays the real world is just pretty people filled with agression, dreams of being famous, and alcohol. (lots and lots of alcohol). it is statistically harder to get onto the real world than it is to get into harvard. i mean really? but anyways, as always i digress. back to the topic, Heroes. so these people are at the top of the popularity heap? i mean really? don't get me started on "musicians." i mean, you can argue that sampling is, in and of itself a musical artform, and i've met people who do tend to do that well, but i mean really, what happened to the beatles? what happened to elvis? what happened to queen, and the ramones, and the yardbirds? i mean, what happened to people playing real music on real instruments? Hendrix didn't play the guitar, he was that guitar. that was an extension of him, now i'm not saying that today's crop of "young talent" isn't talented, but one internet video does not a legend make. (rebecca black, justin bieber, etc.). sorry, HEROES.

why don't we have heroes any more? does it take money to be a hero, and since we're in such a bad economy, we can't have them? well, any die hard fans of JP Morgan and or Batman would say yes, but i disagree. and it's not that there aren't people out there with alot of money, i mean look at sports stars, they're "heroes" and they've got money. but i think it's something else.

this country was founded on having no money in your pocket and making something, or making something of yourself, so that can't be it. is it the politics? well, looking at the current state of people in the "ruling class" you might say that, yeah probably, and there i might have to agree with you. i mean, Roosevelt, Lincoln, Washington, all politicians, but in a time when politics was alot more boiled down, more real. today its all about constituencies, and party lines, and all this crap that just ends up impeding good ideas, and pushing through bad ones. flip floping to serve the moment rather than serving the country. it's terrible, and there are no plans to rectify it in the near future. so, we don't have political leaders as heroes any more, but not all great heroes are politicians, so politics can't be the only answer.

Hellen Keller was, to many a hero. now before you get all up in arms, i'm not gonna argue against something i just wrote. (though i'll admit i do that alot.). but she did something that almost all heroes have in common. she overcame. she was blind. she was deaf. she was a woman. (again, before you get up in arms, she comes from a different time and place than today's world, though i'd argue its still like that in some places). she over came what looked to most like insurmountable odds, and became a great speaker, leader, and of course, hero.

Jackie Robinson is looked on by most, and labeled, as a hero. he existed in a world of heroes, so why should his story be any different? because he was left out because of who he was as a person. he was a black man in what, at the time, was a white man's game/society/world. he over came that, and became a hero to many in the black community, and many black athletes today.

Theodore Roosevelt, arguably one of the greatest presidents of the modern age, and undoubtedly the greatest naturalist ever to work from 1600 Pennsylvania. Roosevelt was not an overly intelligent man, and had a very weak immune system his whole life. he went to harvard, but in the late 1800's only the richest went to college at all. his mother and his wife died on the same day. the same day. but he over came. he kept moving forward.

so what's my common element in these references? today. now, youre thinking, that answer does not properly address the question. let me back up. what happened to the heroes? why don't we have them any more? the real answer: Today. today's world is very different from 100, or 50, or even 25 years ago. technology, medicine, communication, everything moves at an incredible pace. humanity hasn't changed in over 50,000 years. we have no hellen keller's because obstetric, optometric, and audial medicine has come so far since her time. we have no jackie robinsons because we live in a "race-less" society, (although that'll always be arguable at some level). we have no theodore roosevelts, (well, again back to the politics, but) because we have advances in medicine, sociology, and psychiatry, that would mean he wouldn't have to overcome. take a pill. tell a shrink. vote for a black guy. we've solved the worlds "ills" so we don't have problems to overcome.

at least that's what the media will tell you.

do we have problems? yes. are they anywhere near the same problems we had 20 years ago? absolutely not! with every advance in technology and medicine, we solve one problem. but like every coin we earn, it has two sides, and simply presents us with another problem. we can cure cancer, but we can't sell it, so it doesn't happen. we can move mountains, but we can't see the destruction caused by that movement. we can talk to people around the world, but we can't have a conversation across the dinner table.

we need new heroes. we need new leaders. it's like Micheal Douglas says: "we've got serious problems to solve, and we need serious people to solve them." the American President addresses, i think, one of the most important issues in today's political arena, (and that's the quickest and surest way to make true heroes, either be the first, or put your name down on paper, because every sports record will be broken, and every mountain will be climbed), that people don't own up to their shit. i'm serious. i mean, you did something bad, come out and say it, don't try to deny it, (Richard), or try and confuse everyone, (Bill). Honesty is the best policy, is actually the best policy. we need new heroes. we need people with integrity, we need people who want to get things done. we don't need the same old same old. Albert Einstein once said: "the same thinking that caused a problem cannot be used to fix it." we need something new. we need fresh blood. we need another wind. we need the next generation to step up and step out and start getting things done!

You wanna be a hero? Say so.

UPDATE!

so its been a few months since my last post, and for the....6 people who have ever read this, alot has happened! i was convinced by my lying mother to come to houston "for the summer" tho "get help" and "get a temp job" until the fall when i might go back to school. well i DID GET INTO IIT!!! so i'll be doing that in the fall! but the temp job i got here is pointless/useless, so i've just been catching up on web shows and playing lego batman. (which is actually pretty cool). so i thought, hey? why not do some blogging? i'm not doing anything else, so! here we go!

The American Dream: History Lesson? or Current Reality?

You've heard the stories (and subsequently the commercials) about the American dream. People coming to the country from anywhere else in the world, to start over, to dream, and to achieve. the late 19th and early 20th century is literally littered with stories of immigrants and first generation Americans, showing up to Ellis Island with literally nothing but the clothes on their backs, and making a family, a home, and livelihood. you don't often see that around anymore.

What Happened?

Did we take in too many immigrants? as the government thought? Doubtful, seeing as there are still stretches of the west that look the same way they did when Lewis and Clark first saw them, so land isn't the issue.
Did we run out of money? True that the worst economy this country, and the world, has ever seen was in the first half of the 20th Century. But the best economy this country, and the world, has ever seen, was in the 2nd half of the 20th Century.
Did we simply stop believing? In ourselves? in each other? I think the Answer to that is yes. i think somewhere in turmoil of the 60's, somebody said, so what? this country kills its own people, doesn't respect it's ancestors, and spends money on things that don't matter. while it ignores the problems that are growing both short term and long term.

and suddenly that was that. the American dream of anybody can come here and achieve anything became useless, frivolous even. what's the point of prospering in such a toxic enviroment, to end up "the smartest man on the Heap?"

to a certain extent i think that sentiment is still prevalent in some places. but in those places, they know little about the world. what i mean is, the world pays a much larger tax percentage than we do. true, they have universal health care, but the supreme court may just rule that unconstitutional, and then what do we do? people would rather say to hell with my health, at least i'll be free. Freedom. Freedom is a word that isn't spoken in the rest of the world like it is here. we say things like "i've got the 1st amendment, i'm FREE to say whatever i want," and believe me, you are. The Westboro Baptist Church shows us how true that Amendment is. but in most parts of the world, you can't do that. they'll kill you. literally, you speak out against the government, and they'll kill you. you disappear in the middle of the night, literally out of your bed, and your wife and kids never hear from you again. Freedom is what people come to this country for. and to a certain extent, that's the American Dream. Freedom. Equal Opportunity under the Law. In most of the rest of the world, everybody gets the same outcome, no matter where you're born, how old you are, or what color you are. you all get the same outcome. but not here. Here you all get the same shot. The same three strikes at the plate, the same audition. You might fail, but you might achieve something great. you could be homeless begging for money, and then all the sudden you're the voice of the Cleveland Cavaliers. You can come from literally 12 dollars to your name, to having a movie made about your life. you can show up in times square and become a mega star. this is the country of people pulling themselves up by their bootstraps. of digging down deep within, and finding the strength to build that wall, study that book, and make that deal. that's why we celebrate sports so much. because sports are the epitome of human capabilities, and they are constantly jumping higher, running faster, and swinging for the farther fence. And going over.

So is the American Dream dead? No. But it means so much more than it used to.

God Bless the United States of America.